Two useful inventions:
the hotwater bottle and the sandwich

Carry the bath to bed with you
Arrange a fever for your feet
Or two slices of bread with meat.

Eat while reading, playing cards
Do not forget your opponent's face
A hotwater bottle is good for grief.

A bag of rubber like a lung
Works better than Proust, a sandwich crumb
Gives you a look at other hands.

Both together, food and feet
Would be a combination to beat
Except the crumbs and cheese would toast.

A medley of popular classics

Educating himself the man-next-door
...